Hi everyone,
I’m not sure if anyone is still checking my blog, but I decided that I wanted to bring it to a close with a final post.
Things have changed over the last few months that I’ve not been able to write about. Some I couldn’t write about because they were difficult and/or painful for me to process, but other big issues were kept off the blog because I needed to protect other people’s privacy.
The short version is that my new desire for connection and intimacy caused some problems when I returned home to my marriage with new expectations. We’d had a long relationship built upon mutual independence, so my changes (and desire for changes in our relationship) caused a lot of disruption. Ultimately, it was decided that he needed and wanted to continue on that path of autonomy and independence. This was extremely painful to me, as I wanted for him to ‘change’ with me, but I’m trying to remind myself that we each get to choose which path is right for us.
I also decided that I desperately do want to have children, and, at age 40, have little time to waste. I’ve decided to move toward that goal without a partner.
With regard to helping women transition out of sex work, I’ve enrolled in a graduate program in social work and was recently invited to be on a task force that is working to combat human trafficking. I feel like everything is falling into place and have a deep sense of ‘being on the right path’
So, that is where I am now. I hope it makes sense that I had to go quiet as I processed some of these changes. I am now divorced. I think we all get to learn to take the journey as it comes, and I am still getting lots of practice in learning how to do that.
I hope you all are doing well.
Take care,
Jennifer
***
UPDATE: SEPTEMBER 2012
Thanks to all of you who have been checking up on me! I’ve received quite a few notes and inquiries, so wanted to provide an update.
Everything is going very well! I travelled solo to Africa last year, am now a single mother by choice to a sweet baby boy, am halfway through my graduate program (which I LOVE), am working with women who are trying to leave the sex industry, and reconciled with David. My life is super busy these days with school and single motherhood, but I love my busy, simple life a lot more than the leisurely materialistic life that I left behind.
Again, thanks for checking up on me! I don’t have the time to blog these days, but love hearing from you.
Take care,
Jennifer
My sweet boy
86 Comments
Hi Jennifer,
I’m very sorry to see you go and read about your recent challenges. I am happy things are falling into place for you and that you’re moving in a direction that makes you happy! Your blog has been a huge source of strength, information, and inspiration for me. I don’t think I’ll ever be able Thank you enough for that, but Thank you just the same!
Steve
Oh. Wow, that’s a lot.
I’m sure you understand that there are a lot of us who care about what goes on in your life, and for our (my) own selfish reasons we hope you continue to communicate with us (me) on some level.
Good luck on your path! I wish you a whole bunch of well.
Roxanne
Hi Jennifer,
I ran across your blog months ago when I was searching for information about traveling to the Arctic ocean, and read with admiration the personal challenges you’ve encountered throughout life and how courageously you’ve dealt with them. I know from personal experience that it can be healing sometimes to just talk, or write, about them. It’s also helpful to know that we all have them, in one form or another. The very best to you going forward!
Respectfully, Danno
Thanks for sharing the things you have here, and take care of yourself. It’s been interesting watching your journey here, and I hope you find whatever peace you seek.
Best of luck in your new endeavors. It is perfectly understandable that you did not want to air your personal changes in public. Those types of changes are almost always very painful (been there, done that). You can always start blogging again on this or other subjects if you want. I hope you have good support systems/people if you become a single parent. I also hope you will leave this blog up as a resource for us. Thanks so much for all that you have shared in the past on your former journey. I wish you the best as you move forward.
Hi Jennifer,
I just wanted to send you a huge {{hug}} and let you know that I think about you often. Sometimes life has a funny way of paving our path for us. Emotions are not only perfectly normal but necessary for us to function as human beings. Some emotions are, obviously, more enjoyable than others. Instead of the apologetic response, “oh I’m so sorry to hear this”, I say congratulations. Congratulations for continuing on with what it is you were destined to do instead of living a life someone else wants you to live. It may not always be easy but living the truth is more beneficial than living a fictitious fairytale. I wish you nothing but the best and will continue to cheer you on.
Take care of #1 – YOU!
Love always,
Ang
P.S. Drop me an email anytime. <3
Good luck and thanks for all the great posts.
Maybe this is an odd time to be saying “Hello,” but I wanted to write to let you know that I have really enjoyed your blog over the years and to thank you for it.
Actually, “enjoyed” seems too superficial. I’m a painfully private person (who wishes she were less so but can’t seem to just burst out and be public), and somehow reading about your journey was really helpful to me.
Part of me is feeling a bit bereft, like “But no, how can she just *go* and we never see her again!” On the other hand, the blog is yours, and you have already shared so much with us, and I am grateful for that. It’s just the “child stamping foot” part that will miss you and wants to keep you here posting for our benefit.
I’m so glad to read you are moving forward for you, and I love how you are able to analyze your life and your wants and needs and then verbalize them — and then move forward.
Thanks again,
Penna
So sorry to hear about your divorce and the ending of your blogging
I will miss your stories. Good luck with everything in the future! I think you will be a great mom 
Oh, wow. And so the next journey begins. If you ever feel the need, you know where to find me.
Much love.
Jennifer-
I have read your blog for a very long time, and I rarely comment. I wanted to wish you the very best of luck with your future endeavors and the path that you are moving forward on now. Paths have a funny way of winding around and maybe someday you will find yourself wishing for an audience for something…I for one will keep you on my blog reader and will provide that audience.
Good luck to you
Good luck in your new direction. It is sad to end a marriage,but it is better ending a life. You are a strong woman.
C’est la vie
Good luck Jennifer. Enjoy your new adventures!
I’ve enjoyed reading your blog. Thank you for sharing bits of your journey with us.
Jennifer, you will be missed, as evidenced by the 14 comments preceding mine. Thank you for sharing your story with us. I had a feeling that all was not well with your marriage. I am sorry for your loss. All our best to you and your new adventure!
Jennifer, you are a strong, healthy woman with a big heart and a sharp mind. Such a different person from when you started this blog. I know with certainty that life’s reboot will have you doing big things that make a difference to a lot of people. In fact, this blog has already done that for many. As you well know, writing your thoughts and/or feelings can help people on both sides of the screen. Don’t hesitate to start a Jennifer v2.0 blog with a totally different purpose and topic, should you find the desire.
For now, good luck, and ‘au revoir…
Jennifer, you have been such an inspiration for me. I do hope you will keep your blog up and post an update now and then.
You are such a strong interesting person. I will keep your blog on my blog roll hoping to hear from you.
I wish you the best… your baby? I had my one and only at 42. Lots of sleepless wonderful days and nights. nothing like it.
I’m crazy about you, but you know that.
I would give a week’s worth of coffee to see you again one of these days (maybe … but I’d prefer seeing you and still having the week’s worth of coffee).
Stay in touch when/if it’s convenient. Pretty please? With propane on top?
Sounds like a lot of growth, processing, pain and change. Congrats on going through it and standing your ground for what you want in life.
Sending you best wishes for your path forward.
First time I’ve made anykind of comment but now I have to. Your blog will me missed. Good luck to you. I hope for selfish reasons you change your mind and keep in touch.
Wow. I’m sad to see your blog is ending but I am so grateful that I found it. I’ve enjoyed reading your posts. They helped me get through some tough times. Thanks for sharing. Good luck in your future endeavors.
Thank you for checking in. I am glad our paths crossed. I wish you the strength to continue.
Bittersweet. It’s great to hear from you but goodbye was not what I wanted to hear. Having just worked through my own divorce and mid life shake-up I know the emotional roller coaster all too well. You are strong. You write well. Keep sharing these blessings not just for us but you too. We all know the “door of benefits” swung both ways. Meanwhile, may your journey be safe and rewarding wherever your compass leads you. Above all else, be well.
I have enjoyed reading your blogs from beginning to (unfortunately) what is now the end. I will miss your stories. Good luck, and take care of yourself. You will be missed by many.
Boy am I sorry you are ending your blog, it has been a lot of fun following your travels. ben there, don that and maybe i understand. Best of luck, hope you come back.
Thanks for sharing your journey so far with us. You’ve touched a lot of people with what you’ve shared and it’s been great for many people to see you rebuild yourself and the adventures you’ve had so far. I’ve only come across your blog recently but enjoyed reading your story, and am sure many will to come. I wish you all the best for your next journey/path.
Wishing you the very best, Jennifer. Take care. Belva
I will miss your point of view. Wishing you brighter days. LG
Wow. I was suffering insomnia and thought I’d drop in here again in the wee hours. Now I really am awake.
You are nothing if not ambitious. Good for you.
You know, just because you have clarified what you want and are working toward it is no reason not to blog about it. Quite the opposite.
Hope to hear from you again.
Bob G.
Hi Jennifer,
I have really enjoyed your blog since stumbling on to it a while back. I am sorry to hear you’re having such a tough time right now. Just remember, it does get better.
Best of luck with grad school and parenting. I’m a social worker and a parent and love being both. I hope you will as well.
take care
John
I just discovered this blog today. What a shame it has ended. Good luck and thank you for your words.
Hi Jennifer,
Having been through the divorce routine myself, I can empathize with your pain. Time is the great healer.
I admit, too, that I will selfishly miss hearing from you. You are quite a talented writer. If you find yourself seeking a different career path in the future, I would seriously consider trying your hand at becoming a travel writer. You have the experience, talent and wit to do quite well, as witnessed by your loyal band of followers on this blog.
Take care,
Mary Ann
Jennifer, Please write a book. You are a gifted writer and it’s just sad to think of not hearing from you again. Very best wishes to your future.
Andrea
Wow. That is a lot in a few short months. Thank you for everything and be good to yourself.
Jennifer,
My heart goes out to you as you recover from your divorce. You have faced an incredible amount of change in the past year. Do take care of yourself. Good luck with your academic work. I wish there was some way to learn if your are successful in your quest for parenthood. I know you will make a beautiful mother. It has been so wonderful reading your blog. I will miss you so much.
Take care.
Jennifer;
I stumbled across your blog some months ago, as I was in the process of trying to find out what it was going to be like living in a RV while traveling…and trying to figure out what type of RV/Motorhome was going to be right for me…
And in that time, I’ve enjoyed reading your blog comments and can confirm that you have the gift when it comes to writing! I’m sorry to hear about what sounds like the collapse of your marriage…having gone through one myself just a few years ago, I know the type of emotion(s) that are probably being felt right now!
I wish you all the best in your future endeavors and do hope that by some twist of fate, I’ll stumble across the next blog you decide to start up…or hopefully, should it be in the ‘cards’… you’ll return to this one and continue on your path of living free!
Jennifer,
Thanks for the update and the “goodbye,” although I hope it’s just “see you later.” I really want – no need to thank you for your inspiration. Thanks to finding your blog about a year or so ago, I am on my way to full-timing in the spring of 2012! I never would have had the courage to change my life so radically without your example for inspiration. You are one of the most courageous women I “know.” I still hope to get to know you in person some day.
Thank you, thank you, thank you. Best of luck on your ongoing life journey. I hope you’re aware of how many women you have already inspired and helped!
Best of luck and love to you,
Julie in PA
Hey Jennifer,
Just look at this. You don’t post for months, and when you say “the end”, you get 40 replies.
I’d say that shows you are leaving the party way too early.
Drop in and do a high five now and then. You don’t have to bring beer. It doesn’t have to be all serious and everything. Or even connected to what has gone before. Just relax, and chat.
People like you for some reason. Weird, huh?
Bob G.
I check in every once in a while and I always looked forward to reading your blog. Thank you for being so visible and authentic. I pray for you and hope to learn more about your journey (when you are ready) because I know you have the ability to help other women and make a positive impact in their lives. Peace, love and joy!
Jennifer, Bless you on your journey! You’ve touched a lot of lives and I know that each and every one of us wish you well.
Jennifer – I’m saddened to read you and David have grown in different directions, but growth is growth, all the same, eh?
I’ll miss your journaling and hope you’ll return to blogging when it is again comfortable for you. Good luck with your new path and all the training. Be well and Godspeed – LdB
i’ve found that putting closure on a finished life chapter is a healthy thing to do, though it sounds like your changes may warrant a whole new book …or blog hopefully!
the depth of your honest strength and courage is fuel for the soul; please think about how you might be able to take this art of sharing your journeys along with you for the ride – you’ve picked up quite a number of hitchhikers who have enjoyed your company
all the best,
Thank you for all your postings Jennifer..Have appreciated and learned something from all of them.
You have and will continue to make your life worthwhile.
Peace & Love…
Kelly
Sorry to hear about you ending your blog but I understand. Thanks so much for sharing all that you have shared with us and I will be thinking of you fondly and I wish you all the happiness in the world. Kids are wonderfull and one of life greatest chanlenges and I am sure you will be a great parent.
All the best
Dan
Benge and Powder (the Greyhounds)
Kippie (the cat)
Thank you Jennifer for sharing your life and your story.
I wish you all the best on your journey forward.
Please know you have touched my life in a special and meaningful way with your words and your reflections on living an honest life.
Thank You.
Jennifer, good luck to you,be safe stay positive!
Jennifer, good luck to you,be safe, stay positive!
You can’t change the past but you can create the future! You go forth and create a great life.
I’m a 42 male who have never been married but even so your journey has touched my life. Your blogs have inspired and helped many people who you will never met. So I would suggest leaving them up. There are many unseen friends here to support you.
It may be the end to a chapter in your life the the story goes on.
Hello Jennifer,
For every ending there is a new beginning.Take care.
Your blog has been a huge source of inspiration for me in a lot of ways.
Hello Jennifer,
It too often seems that as sons as I find exactly what I’m looking for in a blog, the blogger has just decided to end the blog. I can relate to your experience on so many different levels, downsizing, rv living, spirituality, mental wellness, etc. I wish you the best in your future endeavors, especially the counseling field. Having been in that field for 20 years, my only advice would be, keep the camper! It is the best way to rejuvenate after being in the trenches with those in need. Cheers! Mark
HiYa Jennifer -
Add me to your list of silent followers. I am sorry to see you close your blog, it’s one of the very few that has a true human interest involvement. I admire you greatly for your perseverence and tact. Here’s wishing you the most glorious future – - hope you might reconsider and not close your blog. You can see that you have tons of admirers and followers. Joe – Seattle
Jennifer, so sad to hear about your situation (I’m at the final stages of my own very messy/ugly divorce as well). Hopefully, you’ll keep the blog site up as well as your camper. As you can see, you’ve been an inspiration to many people. I wish you much success and happiness in your new path in life. We become what we are by the experiences in our past. Despite the sadness of your past, I think you turned out great. Stay optimistic, keep smiling and enjoy life. Take care. – Denoy
Hi Jennifer,I have been reading your blog for quite sometime. I have always enjoyed your honesty and the information and knowledge you freely shared. We have walked similar paths in life and I have transitioned from similar lifestyles. I am 20 years older than you and I can tell you that you can remake your life anyway you want at anytime. You’ve proven you have the insight and the courage to do that. Eldridge Cleaver said that if you are not part of the solution you are part of the problem. Jennifer you are definitely part of the solution. Follow your bliss. Just remember that our bliss can change as we age and when we least expect it we need to transition yet again. Enjoy, be safe, live healthy and thank you.
I started following you from your youtube channel. You seem like a lovely person & I wish you the best. Maybe this is selfish, but I’d love to see updates in your youtube vids, esp on the van dwelling lady & of course what happened w/ YOUR ADORABLE RV!!! You are one of the people who have inspired me to downsize. I am partnerless & sometimes get lonely & wonder…but if you are LONELY in a relationship it’s a GAZILLION times worst than being lonely w/o a relationship. Been there :0( 40 is the new 20, don’t sweat it :0)
I just came across your blog on Saturday, and I have no clue on how I found it. I will say that is has been a good read. It’s nice to see that there are others, like myself, that have spinning brains in their head. I really enjoyed seeing someone, such as yourself, turn an idea into reality. I thoroughly enjoyed your brutal honesty towards yourself. I dig when people aren’t afraid to admit/expose flaws in their person. Bravo to you.
I hope things are getting better.
Chin up and don’t forget to smile…you wear it well.
May god bless and watch over you all of your days!
Jennifer, thanks for everything.
Good Luck, God Speed.
James
No!!! This can’t be happening, say it isn’t so. Thanks for inviting us into your life and sharing all the highs and lows all these years. Your stories have been a great source of inspiration, a heartfelt thank you. If you are ever in the Miami area, look me up, or friend me on Facebook when you get a chance! Good luck with everything!
Like all your fine readers, I also appreciate the stories you shared with us along your journey. You have real talent as a story teller. Now you will have the opportunity and the privilege to help others tell their stories. Gather them. It is who you are. Protect those stories and share the lessons. You do it with insight and humor and that reaches us all. Like your story, they will inspire because we all recognize courageous growth. I applaud your decisive new direction and wish you the best.
I had lost you for awhile and just found you again . I wish
you only the best. I, like so many, would love to hear from
you at least occasionally. You are much loved & have provided
inspiration to so many. Please don’t leave permanently~~
Simply Believe Jennifer~~Simply Believe~~~
Hi Jennifer,
I stumbled across your blog through youtube or a website which led to youtube, which led to you. I usually don’t comment, but I must say you will be missed. I wish you well on your continued journey of “life”. I appreciated your candor, humor and RVer tips. At this moment (last month to be exact) I’ve been hiding from life trying to figure out what I want/need to do with the rest of my life. I’ve gone through the above moments many times in my life (this moment may be a record)and reading your blogs today has helped, made me laugh and made me think it is possible to move forward and get better/healed. Thank you for sharing! Sending good thoughts for much happiness/fulfillment your way! Hope you change your mind and come back <3 Tina
Mine makes 63 good lucks… I think a lot more read your blog than you know maybe leave it open, drop the .com when it expires and give everyone the blogspot url. Whatever you do, whatever path you decide on good luck and I hope you find what you are looking for.
It’s all good Jennifer! I’m so so so glad you shared all these experiences with us and thank you for giving us an update. Drop us a line when you start your next blog ;D
I just now found your blog! And as a fellow nomadic type (vandweller) I was very much inspired by reading your blog. I also used to be in the same entertainment industry as you. So I related on a few things in your blog. BUT I hate to see that it has come to an end! I have just now started living out of my van and I loved to see your journal of adventures and all. You really must keep in touch! I feel like I just met a kindred spirit online and have lost touch all in the same day.
It’s sad. Please keep in touch! I’d love to hear from you.
Great blog. I’ve been living in my van for 2 months and this blog has so many tips that I can use (finances permitting) to make my life more comfortable. If any of you other vandwellers or wannabes want to connect, please check out my blog at livinginmyvan.com and let’s rap!
Hi, I wanted to connect with you. I’d like to ask you a few questions about some particulars of vandwelling. I am now in a 32 ft fifth wheel and rigging it to be off grid. Congrats on getting into grad school and thank you for your contribution to the community by documenting your brave experience.
Sitting in my RV outside my wifes house so confussed,depression haunts me daily.. She takes care of everyone (doctor). I say get out of the way an let me take care of you, she just can’t do it.. 15yrs trying to figure it out, My 3rd attempt to leave hopeing to get my point across. Friends and family all think I am crazey which does come and go:}.. Sitting on the beach for days never leaving my RV.. I say love and peace in ones heart will bring you riches beyond your wildest dreams and most tell me I am a fool.. Trueth is over rated and greed is in.. Your comments from beginning to end are a mirror image of my last 5yrs (except strring :} dought anyone would want to see me strip).. I just hope the depression that parralizes me so frenquently will subside long enough to get out for good and face the fact. Onee can only change self and no matter how much joy may be on the other side you can’t make any one join you.. Peace Out Rick
I lived in a van once.. Everything u write matches my story
Hi Jennifer,
I just found your blog, actually I found it because of YouTube. I watched the 34 videos and found them very interesting, which lead to the blog. I was really impressed with the whole thing.I have driven the ALCAN 27 times and it’s a new adventure each and every time, wow! However, as life would have it you are no longer doing the blog. A day late and a dollar short, story of my life.
Anyway, if you get this I am very much interested in your present not in your past. I would like to find out how things have been going for you so far. Believe me I am an expert in hard knocks! But they never keep me down.
Remember this, the past is history, the future is unknown, but today, is a gift because it is the present. Don’t worry always be happy, that’s what I always say.
Have a wonderful, wonderful day.
Hope things are going great for you.
Miss you.
Hi Jennifer,
Sorry to see you are not blogging anymore. But I do wish you well
I found your blogs because I want to try RVing for fun. You just remind me a lot of a dear friend of mine who is adventurous and just took a liking to your videos. Good Luck! I hope you blog about RVing again.
Elle
I know this isn’t what you want to hear, but you need to hear it. You need to repent of your sins and receive Jesus Christ as your savior NOW, before it’s too late. Divorce and remarriage is not an option for anyone. To do so is to commit adultery, and having children out of wedlock just for the sake of wanting children…well, it’s just plain wrong.
This site will help you get to know that Jesus is real, and is the ONLY way to salvation, which every person can have if they’ll only believe AND follow Christ.
Y-Jesus.com
It’s been a while since I checked out your blog. I hope you’re healing, at peace and perhaps waiting for a baby to arrive. Best of luck on your journey through life.
Just found your blog – great stuff…
I can relate (as many can) – just finished a medical “adventure” last year and now have an RV and going for the next adventure.
Wherever you are, best of luck to you!
Angel (my dog who got me through many dark nights),
& Stu
WOW..Dave’s comment on July 27, 2012 # 73 is INSANE. Please pay no mind to such utter nonsense. It is so scary what indoctrination can do to people. FRIGHTENING actually. Plus what he wrote is absolutely absurd. I hope you are able to get everything out of THIS life that you possibly can because it is the ONLY life you get before the eternal dirt nap. Dave….please get some psychotherapy ASAP and/or hypnotism to un-brain wash you. WOWEEEEEE
Sorry it had to end on such a bitter note. Hope things are going better for you and that you can move on to bigger and better things. Take the time you need to recoup.
jen, i following living in my car from the 1st all the way to alaska-a couple years. the blog ended on a down note. i felt bad for you.
i was following the new blog you set up with the baby on board pictures til around march. i thought you were due in april. my computer has crashed and all contents lost and i cannot remember the name of the new blog. i cannot find you anywhere and keep checking living in my car once in awhile. i would like to know if you and the baby are okay and how things are going. how can i find that new blog? my best, em
Thanks for the update and the picture of your cute little boy! I’m so happy that things have worked out well for you.
Hi!
How would a 53 year old guy from Wyoming who is retired and kinda doing what you were doing, date you and your child? You sure sound interesting! Good luck in your life………. You are doing the right thing with having a child! Single parenting is tough, but then nothing good comes easy.
Mike in Wyoming
While researching Class B diesel motor homes on YouTube, I came across your RV video and really enjoyed it. I’m also interested in the Mercedes Sprinter chassis (my favorite so far being Leisure Travel Vans Unity or Serenity) and thought you did an excellent job making the inside of your RV look more like a warm & cozy home than a vehicle. I was impressed. The Dempster highway video clips were a bit unnerving to watch. You are one brave gal! and I’m happy to see your Mercedes diesel didn’t leave you stranded in the middle of nowhere. I had to click on your website and saw your update post from last month. Congratulations becoming a parent and also with your studies and reconciling with your husband! With the new changes in your life, I’m wondering if you are done with RV’ing (did you sell it)? You come across like a super sweet sincere & gutsy person worthy of nothing but good karma! All the best to you! My wife and I might try the motor home thing once our son gets into college next year… go see the country. For now, it’s reading up on the internet. P.E.
Great to hear from you! What a handsome boy. Take care and have a great holiday season.
Dan
I’m so glad I found this addendum; I’ve been checking the other blog for months hoping for news!
I’m so glad that you are doing so well. Congratulations on your beautiful baby boy.
Kind of confused… you went to Africa and came back with a baby? Did your husband have sex with you in Africa? How did you get pregnant?
Wow! speechless. I found you surfing YouTube, I wish you all the luck and happiness.
-Texas
Double Wow!
I saw your posting on RV.net and came back here.
I’m glad you have updated us on your situation, and new baby. Congrats, he is beautiful!
It is amazing that even after more than a year has gone by folks are finding your blog and love your writing and are responding to you. Please find the time to post again. I have never seen so much love flow in both directions.
Love,James