Me and my AA friends

I am the worst AA student. (But I am a good mechanics student! Okay, back to the topic….) I hear people in the meetings say, “I was lucky to have the gift of desperation.” Well, I guess I am unlucky with that. I am lucky in that I recognize that I cannot drink successfully, but I don’t feel ‘desperate’ with regard to my relationship with alcohol. (Doomed? Maybe that.)Lips-That-Touch-Liquor-Shall-Not-Touch-Ours

The catch is that I like these people so much! They are the funniest damn people. They are the most *real* group of people you will ever encounter. AA meetings have all the happy spiritual feel good of some low-key church with all the “Let me tell you what a f*ck up I am” realness (and hilarity) of a bar.

People tell terrible stories about themselves! (And not just from their past when they drank, but from how they are still living very imperfectly today – as a parent, employee, spouse, etc.)

There is no pretentiousness, no self righteousness. Everyone shares their own experience in such an honest and raw way. You cannot believe the horrible stuff you start to laugh at. (People cry too, of course.)

So, I don’t have the gift of desperation. I pretty much suck at doing all the stuff I am supposed to do. I am not always sure I really want to quit drinking forever. But I know that of all the people I know, this is the group of people that I just want to be like. And I guess I have to quit drinking to do that.

So, congratulations to me. I get my 3 month chip today.

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