You are going to be murdered!

When I tell people (quite tentatively, I’ll admit) that I’m selling my house and moving into an RV, I get a few different reactions. Shitter was fullMost women are of the, “You go girl!” variety, but many of my Texas women friends (of the big hair, big SUV, and really big purse variety) look at me with concern and confusion. As if this seemingly normal woman has turned into Cousin Eddie from Christmas vacation.

I am not sure if they are more worried about me or that I’m going to pull up in front of their McMansion and ask to dump my waste tanks. (No, wait, I am sure. It is definitely the latter they are more worried about.)

But, the more disturbing response is the person who is certain that, as a woman traveling alone, I am going to be immediately murdered by the crazed serial killer stalking the freeways. This strange mix of concern for my safety and explicit sexism is harder to respond to.

I don’t want to be irresponsible, but more importantly, I don’t want irrational fears to keep me locked in my house, sucking down Chardonnay, and watching another episode of Globetrekker.

So, realistically, what are the odds that I will be attacked by a serial killer stalking the freeways? I decided to do the math.

Axe MurdererAccording to the FBI, there are approximately 50-300 serial killers in the United States in any given year.

According to the US Census, there are approximately 300,000,000 people in the United States.

So, for easy math, let’s say there are 300 serial killers out of 300 million people.

300/300,000,000 equals 3/300,000 equals 1/100,000.

So, according to this data, one out of every 100,000 persons is a killer.

BUT, serial killers don’t kill everyone. Let’s say that they kill one out of every ten people they meet.

Some basic probabilities:

1/100,000 times 1/10 equals 1/1,000,000.

So, the odds of me meeting a serial killer and of him selecting me to be murdered are about one in one million. (The odds of me being struck by lightning are one in 700,000.)

I am not saying I am not scared, because I am! Last night I dreamtĀ  I saw a man in a truck with an Inuvik license plate and I frantically ran up to him, asking, “Do you think it is safe for me to drive my RV on the Dempster Highway?”

Unfortunately, he didn’t answer, so I guess I get to figure that one out for myself.

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